FROM THE HEART

Without volunteers, the dreams of what TMFSI will become couldn’t be realized.  It takes many hands and many  hearts to accomplish the goals we are setting forth in this foundation and it will take many more over the years as we grow together and break the silence.  Last night we opened up for our very first volunteer committee meeting.  We wanted to not only have a personal connection to those who want to be involved, for whatever their reasons are, but also to share why we are doing what we are doing here.  We were able to discuss several events we have coming up and to gain new insights or ideas from others.  The meeting went very well and we are certain that we will soon be known throughout this region as a place where anyone that has been affected by this will be able to come and talk, be among those who understand and perhaps find healing in volunteering as well.  All that said, we were very happy to see Megan Korando join our team.  Megan experienced a loss last fall and we knew that she has been working in the area to help the community of women and families struggling through their losses.  I want to first allow Megan to share her story with you:

Thursday, September 25, 2014 was a morning not unlike any other fall morning around our home. The crops were ready to be harvested and I was working on the final touches of what was to be our daughter, Blair’s, nursery. I fought back the nagging worry that something wasn’t right and double checked my hospital bags and prepared the car seat to install after returning home from what was to be my last routine appointment before our pre-op appointment the following week.  Blair was scheduled to be delivered via repeat c-section on October 8th, just three days before her due date but the on again and off again contractions I had been having over the last few days told me she had other plans.  I dropped our son, Wade, off at my mother in law’s and made my way to Carbondale.  Upon entering the room I can recall the first thing I told Kelly, my NP, was that I was almost worried over the weekend because I hadn’t been feeling Blair like I had been. Because she was breech, had dropped, and the age old myth that babies slow down at the end, I stuffed my fears away and decided that I was still feeling her move, it was just different.  The moment Kelly put the Doppler on my swollen belly and I heard nothing but silence I knew my worst fear had become our tragic reality.  Holding on to hope she grabbed a different Doppler and checked to see if they could get me in for a quick ultrasound. I held my faith that we would get in there and see her wiggling away and we would all laugh about the scare she gave us.  As we walked down the hallway to the ultrasound room it hit me. In one moment I nearly dropped to my knees and everything became blurred. I can remember Kelly asking me who she could call just in case, giving her Matthew and my mothers numbers, and the deep fog that began to settle in.  The moment they put the wand on and our daughter came up on the screen my world came crashing down.  In one statement, five words, my life would never be the same. Our little girls heart had stopped beating and for the time being we had no clue why.  My family arrived, joined me one by one in sorrow, and we began discussing what our options were.  Matthew and I chose to go home, digest what was happening, and to call when we had made our decision. By that evening we had decided to go ahead and schedule the c-section for the following day, Friday, September 26th, at noon. We spent the evening with a house full of family and friends unsure of what to do but surround us with their love. By eleven that night everyone had cleared out and I was trying to get some rest when I noticed the contractions had began to pick up. After timing them for an hour they were as far apart as eight minutes and as close as four minutes and I called Dr. Gates at 12:17am to inform him of what was going on. They weren’t very intense and he suggested a hot bath or shower to see if that slowed them down and if not to come in.  As I drew my bath water I noticed some changes that told me we needed to go.  In a matter of no time they quickly picked up and we where on our way to the hospital.  One of my sisters-in-law was in the car with us and decided to call an ambulance who requested we stop and wait for them. I told Matthew, no way, we will never make it. As we came into Carbondale my water broke and in an instant Blair began to make her way into this world. We met an ambulance who rushed me the final blocks to the hospital where Blair would finish her birth at 1:33am on September 26th. After she was born it was clear what took our darling daughter from us. She had a perfect storm of cord issues that came together in the worse way. Her cord was wrapped around her neck three times and she had a very tight knot in it.  She was perfect and beautiful in every way.  Holding the lifeless shell of our daughter I knew in that moment she would always be a part of me. Though she would never take a breath on this earth I would breathe every day for her.  Her short life gave me so many wonderful gifts. The grace and the compassion to be able to live life as completely as I can.  Through our faith and our family we have turned our darkest days into something so bright and beautiful. Because I live, Blair lives and each day she gives me the strength to put one foot in front of the other and rejoice in knowing that one day we will be together again. 

Megan shared her story with the group last night and left us all in tears, as you can imagine.  She reminded us, once again, why we are doing this.  It was when she announced that she would like to continue Blair’s Cuddle Run through TMFSI, she had funds left over from the first event and that she would like to donate them to TMFSI, that the only sound you could hear was tear drops falling.  Megan gave TMFSI a check for $4,772.89!  Speechless.  We are very excited to work with such an absolutely wonderful person.  If you get a chance to meet Megan, you will surely understand why.

IMG_20150722_230233

Megan Korando’s donation to TMFSI. 6/22/15

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One thought on “FROM THE HEART

  1. Terri Duke says:

    Everyone of you ladies are just remarkable, I know that each one of your mothers are just as proud of you as I am of my Megan. God bless each one of you for being a true blessing in this crazy world of ours!

    Like

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